Corey Heim, a 24-year-old part-time driver with no confirmed full-time seat until next season, wins after Denny Hamlin's own Joe Gibbs Racing teammates fail to organise a coordinated push behind him on the final restart

SATIRE
ONLY
NOT REAL

DECISION BULLETIN

Brickyard 400

31 July 2026

FromThe Stewards

ToThe General Public

Document15

CategoryOther Motorsport

Time07:20

The Stewards, acting on a tip from no one in particular, have concluded the following:

Fact Corey Heim, a 24-year-old part-time driver with no confirmed full-time seat until next season, wins after Denny Hamlin's own Joe Gibbs Racing teammates fail to organise a coordinated push behind him on the final restart

Decision The Stewards have reviewed the restart in detail and can confirm "teammate" remains a largely ceremonial title inside the NASCAR garage. Hamlin led the race, lost the restart, and was overtaken with direct help from a rival driver, while the two Joe Gibbs cars immediately behind him appeared to treat "push" as more of a suggestion than an instruction. Heim is now a two-time Cup Series winner and the youngest Brickyard 400 champion since 1994 — a fact the Stewards find both impressive and deeply embarrassing for everyone else in the building.

Reason #NASCAR #Brickyard400 #Heim #Hamlin #DecisionBulletin