SATIRE
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NOT REAL
DECISION BULLETIN
Perth Super440
08 August 2026
The Stewards have reviewed the situation from several angles, none of which exist, and rule as follows:
Fact
Supercars Perth Super440: Matt Payne Wins Race 3 Despite Left-Rear Tyre Coming Apart Mid-Race
Decision
Matt Payne held off Broc Feeney to win Race 3 of the Perth Super440 while driving the closing laps on a left-rear tyre that slow-motion replays showed was visibly out of shape and close to coming off the bead entirely. The Stewards note that "winning by more than a second" and "the tyre was actively falling apart underneath him" are not typically expected to occur in the same sentence, and commend Payne for treating a potential structural failure with the same composure most drivers reserve for slightly greasy track conditions. Feeney, for the record, was having an almost identical crisis one car length behind and simply didn't win.
Reason